Sebastien Hotel Philippines: Paradise Found? (Unbelievable Views & Amenities!)
Sebastien Hotel Philippines: Paradise Found? (Or Did I Just Get Slightly Burned?) - A Hot Mess of a Review
Alright, alright, settle in, because I'm about to spill the beans on the Sebastien Hotel Philippines. This isn't your standard, sanitized review. This is real – the good, the questionable, and the “did I just spend a small fortune on a glorified bathtub?” kind of real. Buckle up, buttercups.
First Impressions & The Quest for Accessibility (Spoiler: It's a Mixed Bag)
So, the pictures. The pictures. They’re what got me. That infinity pool with the, like, unbelievable view? Yeah… that’s the hook. But let’s get real, folks. I care about accessibility. My friend uses a wheelchair, so finding a place that works for both of us is a HUGE deal.
Accessibility: The website says “facilities for disabled guests.” Okay. But “facilities” can mean a ramp that's basically a death trap or a room the size of a shoebox. Upon arrival, the elevator situation seemed… adequate. But the hallways? Narrower than a politician's promises. Getting the wheelchair through was a test of wills (and my friend's upper body strength!). Once inside the room(more on that later), we were good because of the wheelchair accessible room.
Here's where my stream-of-consciousness splatters a bit:
- Elevator: Check. (mostly)
- Hallways: A little tight. Prepare to apologize a lot.
- Accessible Room: YES! (Phew!) This was a life-saver, truly. Spacious bathroom, good maneuvering space. Points for that, Sebastien!
- Outside: The main areas are… mostly accessible. The outdoor pool area… well, not as much. Steps, uneven ground… I'm shaking my head. So. Many. Steps. This hotel needs to seriously address this if they're claiming to cater to disabled guests.
Accessibility Score: 3/5 (Room Access saved it. Seriously, though, more work to be done!)
The Rooms: Lush, But Did Anyone Think About the Practicalities?
The pictures promised luxury, and… they delivered. The room was gorgeous. Seriously, magazine-worthy. Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, alarm clock, bathrobes (YES!), bathtub, blackout curtains (bless!), carpeting, closet, coffee/tea maker, complimentary tea, daily housekeeping, desk, extra long bed (score!), free bottled water, hair dryer, high floor, in-room safe box, interconnecting room(s) available, ironing facilities, laptop workspace, linens, mini bar, mirror, non-smoking, on-demand movies, private bathroom, reading light, refrigerator, safety/security feature, satellite/cable channels, scale, seating area, separate shower/bathtub, shower, slippers, smoke detector, socket near the bed, sofa, soundproofing, telephone, toiletries, towels, umbrella, visual alarm, wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], window that opens.
But… and there's always a but, isn't there? My laptop workspace was… well, it looked lovely, but the lighting was atrocious. I spent half the evening squinting at my screen like a grumpy owl. And the scale in the bathroom? Seriously? Is this a hotel or a wellness retreat designed to make you feel self-conscious? I avoided it.
The bathroom itself was beautiful. The water pressure, fantastic. The size of the shower – generous! But the way it was positioned near the bathtub area. It was a little bit confusing because of the space- for us, and the wheelchair, even after getting a wheelchair accessible room, it was still pretty tight.
Rooms Score: 4/5 (Style points, but function could use a tune-up! Especially around the bathrooms.)
Food, Glorious Food (and the Occasional Disappointment)
Okay, let's talk food. Because, let's be honest, a good vacation hinges on the grub.
Dining, drinking, and snacking: A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant.
Breakfast was a buffet. A massive buffet. Breakfast [buffet],, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Western breakfast, Asian breakfast. Eggs, pancakes, bacon, pastries… you name it, it was there. But… (again with the buts!). The coffee tasted like dishwater. Seriously, I went to the coffee shop every morning.
The restaurants: Restaurants, A la carte in restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Desserts in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Salad in restaurant. The dinner was delicious. The Asian restaurant was fantastic. The service was impeccable. I highly recommend the curry.
The poolside bar: Poolside bar, Bottle of water, Coffee/tea in restaurant. The happy hour was definitely a highlight. Great cocktails, stunning sunset. Pure bliss!
Food Score: 4/5 (Buffet coffee needs an intervention. But the overall dining experience, especially the restaurants, was top-notch!)
Ways to Relax (and Avoiding the Body Wrap)
The hotel had the whole shebang. Things to do, ways to relax: Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]. A fitness center, a spa, and an outdoor pool with that view (I told you, it’s a selling point!).
I'm not a body wrap kind of guy, so I skipped that. But the massage? Oh. My. Goodness. I got the deep tissue massage. My muscles were screaming with joy by the end of it, my masseuse was a saint. I skipped the Sauna, Spa, Steamroom because I'm not that kind of person, but they looked luxurious!
The pool… ah, the pool. The Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]. It's exactly like the photos. Spectacular. The water was crystal clear, and the view… well, it made you feel on top of the world.
Relaxation Score: 5/5 (That massage alone… worth the price of admission!)
Cleanliness and Safety: Is It Really Safe to Breathe?
In these post-pandemic times, cleanliness is paramount. Cleanliness and safety: Anti-viral cleaning products, Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment.
The hotel seemed to be taking things seriously. Hand sanitizer everywhere. Staff trained in safety protocol. The staff all wore masks. Everything felt… sanitized. The rooms were spotless. The daily disinfection in common areas was noticeable, without being intrusive. Overall, I felt safe and at ease.
Safety Score: 5/5 (Putting minds at ease!)
The Quirks, The Annoyances, and The Little Extras
Okay, let’s get into the nitty-gritty. Little things that either made my stay better or made me want to scream into a pillow.
Internet: Internet Access, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!, Wi-Fi in public areas, Wi-Fi for special events, The Wi-Fi! Fast, reliable, and free! A godsend. The Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless availability in the room was also great.
Services and conveniences: Services and conveniences: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Xerox/fax in business center.
For the kids: For the kids: Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal.
The Staff. The staff were all nice. They seemed trained to provide good service.
The Little Things: They had these wonderful little welcome treats in the room. They also
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into my chaotic, possibly disastrous, but hopefully hilarious (for you, at least) itinerary for the Sebastien Hotel in the Philippines. This isn't your glossy travel brochure. This is real. Prepare for some serious travel-induced angst and maybe a little bit of joy.
The Sebastien Hotel: Operation Get-Away-From-It-All (and Possibly Myself)
Day 1: Arrival - Ordeal by Airport (and Questionable Coffee)
- 7:00 AM (ish): Ugh. Alarm clock. The enemy. Drag myself out of bed, convinced I’m still dreaming. My luggage is a disaster zone – I swear half my clothes are missing. Flight? Delayed, naturally. I'm already regretting this.
- 9:00 AM (ish): Manila airport. Smells of… well, everything. And desperation. Finding my transfer. The driver's wearing a shirt that’s seen better decades. He insists on talking about his ex-wife. My first taste of Filipino hospitality – intense.
- 12:00 PM (ish): Finally! Arrived at the Sebastien Hotel. The lobby is… surprisingly swanky. Marble floors, massive chandeliers, way too many orchids. I'm not sure if I'm underdressed or just overwhelmed. Check-in is smooth. The receptionist (who looks like she’s stepped out of a magazine) smiles politely as I fumble with my passport. She’s already way more put-together than I'll be all trip.
- 1:00 PM (ish): Room: Decent view of the… parking lot? Fine. Whatever. At least there’s air conditioning. Immediately try to unpack, fail miserably. My suitcase is a black hole of crumpled garments. Decide to postpone unpacking.
- 1:30 PM (ish): Lunch at the hotel restaurant. Ordered the "signature" adobo. It came out hot. It was a little bit salty. Overall, it was… fine. The guy at the next table is loudly slurping his soup. Embrace the chaos.
- 3:00 PM (ish): Nap. Needed. The jet lag is hitting me like a ton of bricks (or a particularly grumpy airport security guard).
- 5:00 PM (ish): Poolside. The pool is actually nice, the water is cool and refreshing. Order a mojito. It's either the best or worst mojito I've ever had. Or maybe I'm just easily pleased at this point? The sun is setting and everything looks pretty, for a while.
- 7:00 PM (ish): Dinner. Trying street food nearby. I'm terrified the food will be bad. Went to a spot recommended by a local… turns out it’s their favorite spot, which they said I should expect great things from it. I'm starving. I eat the food. It's really, really good. I have a massive craving for more.
- 9:00 PM (ish): Back to the hotel. Attempt to watch TV, fail because of the million cable channels. Sleep. Maybe.
Day 2: Exploring (and Possibly Getting Lost)
- 8:00 AM (ish): Wake up. Sun beaming in. Breakfast is included! Scrambled eggs, toast, and… a tiny, perfect cup of coffee. Okay, maybe this isn’t so bad after all. This is going to be a good day, I think.
- 9:00 AM (ish): Attempt to walk the city, find a guide online. The guide book is incredibly unhelpful. I think I've gotten lost within five minutes. Ask for direction from a local, they're really kind and helpfull.
- 12:00 PM (ish): Lunch, find the biggest buffet. Ate way too much, feel like I could fall asleep anywhere.
- 2:00 PM (ish): Head to the beach, it's the most beautiful beach I've seen in my life.
- 5:00 PM (ish): Try to get back to the hotel. Get lost again. Ask for directions.
- 7:00 PM (ish): Dinner. Order room service this time.
- 9:00 PM (ish): Write down all my thoughts, take notes, read a book. Try to sleep but end up staring at the ceiling.
Day 3: The Great Beach Revelation (and a Lot of Sunscreen)
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast. Okay, I'm getting the hang of this coffee situation. Another dose of scrambled eggs, toast, and a perfect coffee, and the world's not so bad. Maybe the Philippines isn't out to get me after all.
- 10:00 AM: BEACH DAY. Okay, FULL beach day. This is what I came for. Book a massage on the beach. Pure bliss. The sound of the waves, the scent of the ocean, the absolute oblivion of a good massage. I could stay here forever.
- 12:00 PM: Lunches are the best!
- 1:00 PM: Just float in the water, let the warm water take over.
- 2:00 PM: The sun. It's relentless. I'm slathered in sunscreen every hour. I reapply every few hours. I become obsessed with not getting sunburnt.
- 4:00 PM: Stroll along the beach, collecting shells. Get distracted by a group of local kids playing volleyball. They're so happy, so carefree—it’s infectious. The air is full of laughter and salty spray.
- 6:00 PM: Sunset. The colors are unreal. I feel… content? Is that even possible?
- 7:00 PM: Dinner by the beach. Fresh seafood. I’m starting to appreciate the simplicity of life. The sky explodes in brilliant colors.
- 8:00 PM: Drinks!
- 9:00 PM: Back to the hotel. Another room service and TV. Another sleepless night.
Day 4: Goodbye (and Probably More Chaos)
- 8:00 AM: Final breakfast. Savor the coffee. Really savor it.
- 9:00 AM: Quick souvenir shopping. Realize I have no space in my suitcase. Commence strategic packing, or attempt to.
- 11:00 AM: Check-out. Say goodbye to the friendly receptionist.
- 12:00 PM: Airport. Pray for a less chaotic flight.
- 1:00 PM: Flight. Delayed, of course.
- End: Overall, it was a messy, imperfect, often frustrating, but undeniably memorable trip. The Philippines, and the Sebastien Hotel, had their moments of pure magic.
- Future Notes: I'll always remember… how utterly terrible my packing skills are. And how much better coffee tastes when you're surrounded by sunshine and good vibes. Until next time, Sebastien!
Sebastien Hotel Philippines: Paradise... Found? (Okay, Mostly Found!)
Prepare for a rollercoaster, folks. Buckle up, 'cause I've been there, and let me tell you...
Okay, spill. Is the view REALLY as insane as the pictures?
Alright, let's start with the view. The pictures? Yeah, they’re good. But the *reality*... it’s like someone cranked up the saturation button on life itself. Seriously, the first time I saw it, I actually *gasped*. Silly, I know. I’m not normally a gasper. But the turquoise water, the dramatic cliffs, the way the sun hits everything... It’s enough to make you question all your life choices – in a good way! I’m talking, you're basically living inside a postcard.
(Anecdote time!) I remember trying to take a "perfect" photo. Hours! Swatting bugs, balancing on a treacherous ledge, almost falling into the pool (more on that later!). My photos? Utterly garbage compared to the real thing. The view just… *escapes* the limitations of a camera. You have to *be there* to understand.
The amenities… they boast about them a lot. Are they worth the hype?
Amenities... okay, here’s where things get a little… *complicated*. The infinity pool? Glorious. Absolutely. You can swim while looking like you’re about to fall off the edge of the world. That's the good stuff.
The spa? Supposed to be amazing. I *wanted* to love it. But honestly? The massage therapist's hands were a little… *uneven*. One side of my back felt like it got a deep tissue workout, the other… like a gentle breeze. Still, the view from the treatment room? Worth a few wonky kneads, I guess. Plus, if you don't like it, just tell them! I wish *I* had... but I'm British, and we don't complain. Ever.
(Messy thought): The bar... ah, the bar. The cocktails were... hit or miss. Sometimes heavenly. Other times, they tasted suspiciously like watered-down fruit punch. I think the bartender might have had an off night or two. Or three. I’m not judging...but it *was* a lot of juice.
The rooms… are they as luxurious as they look in photos?
Rooms... a mixed bag. Let's be honest. They *look* incredible. Think crisp white linens, a balcony practically *begging* you to Instagram it, a HUGE bed you could lose a small child in. And yes, they are, mostly.
However... (and here's my one big, messy "but" moment)...my A/C decided to be *temperamental*. One minute it was a frosty wonderland, the next…a sweaty sauna situation! I spent half my time fiddling with the thermostat and the other half trying to avoid melting into a puddle. Eventually, they fixed it, but those first few nights were… *rough*. And let's not even talk about the ants in the bathroom. Nature, I get it. But in my luxury room? Rude.
Is the food any good? (Because let's face it, good food is ESSENTIAL.)
Okay, FOOD. This is important. And I'm pleased to report... mostly yes! The seafood? AMAZING. Seriously, fresh, grilled, melt-in-your-mouth DELICIOUSNESS. The breakfast buffet? A solid offering. Pancakes, eggs, fruit, the works. I ate enough to fuel a small army. (Don't judge me!).
The lunch menu, however... a bit repetitive. And the service... well, it was attentive, but sometimes a little *slow*. I once waited 40 minutes for a sandwich. Forty minutes! I'm not sure if they had to catch the cow, milk it, and then… you get the picture. Still, I found a good book, and the view from the restaurant made waiting almost bearable.
What about the staff? Are they friendly?
The staff? Generally, yes. They were incredibly polite and helpful. The Filipino hospitality is legendary, and these guys didn’t disappoint. They were always smiling, always willing to assist. They really make an effort to be great.
But... and this is the honest part... there was a slight communication barrier at times. My attempts to order a specific cocktail were occasionally met with a shrug and a confused look. But hey, a little lost in translation never hurt anyone, right? And their genuine warmth more than made up for it.
Is it really "Paradise Found?" Or just really expensive?
Paradise... found? Okay, here's the truth bomb: it's not *perfect*. There are quirks. There are imperfections. There's probably going to be something that irks you! But the good outweighs the bad. BIG TIME. Would I go back? Hell, yes. Despite the A/C drama, the occasional slow service, and the slightly questionable cocktails, the view, the food, the overall vibe... it's intoxicating.
It's a place where you can forget your worries, disconnect from the world, and just… *breathe*. Yes, it's expensive. But the experience? The memories? The sheer, unadulterated *beauty* of it all? Priceless. Especially if you're staring at that view while sipping a (mostly) delicious cocktail. Go. Just go. And be prepared to be amazed (and maybe a little bit annoyed at the ants). You get used to everything.
Did you REALLY almost fall in the pool?
Okay, fine. Let's get into the whole "almost falling in the pool" thing. So, I mentioned the infinity pool, right? Stunning. Edge of the world, etc.
Well, one evening, after maybe a few too many cocktails (the *good* cocktails this time!), I was admiring the sunset. Admiring, admiring... and then *woosh*. Lost my balance. Clumsy, I know. Picture this: me, flailing dramatically, arms windmilling, about to faceplant into the water. Luckily, some kind soul grabbed my arm just in time. I owe that person a massive thank you! The moral of the story? Don't get too close to the edge after a night of drinking. Unless you enjoy an impromptu dip.
Any other tips or things to be aware of?
Okay, a few rapid-fire tips:
- Bring bug spray: SeriouslyFind Hotel Now
